Chillax Time

Ok. Ice age I haven't been blogging lol. Well, had a rough week lately - termites attack on dining cabinets. That means burning $$ and it's Chinese New Year soon *sigh* Pity my parents. I sleep extremely late these days... about 4-5am. XD

Oh yeah! Recently, I have an idol that I admire - Guy Wilson. You guys should watch "Werewolf: The beast among us." Terrific. Period. This guy is special as in.. he doesn't hide from the media much during an interview, which is something I admire the most - being yourself wherever you are. Best thing is he'd reply his fans' tweet *haha* You can follow him by @THEguywilson on Twitter. You might also wanna follow @GuyWilsonFans for his recent updates. I dreamed of working together with Guy few days ago and I woke up confused BECAUSE..... I'm studying engineering. I would really love to venture into filming industry. Sounds fun and challenging. Wadya think ?

Anyway, write till now I'm afraid *yawns* Gotta sleep soon. If you notice the right column of my blog, there's few gadget that if you can, do me a favour by following me on Twitter / Guy Wilson's / GuyWilsonFans' Twitter. You can also help me by asking me questions about anything. I'm cool with it. I'll try to answer as much as I can 'cuz I've nothing to do normally 'cept going out to fetch my sister, etc. (talk about extreme boredom here) So please help out by asking more questions :-)

For your info, I'm working part-time as a writer. You can ask me to check on your documents / language assignments for free (proofreading). But if you want me to make corrections / editing, I'll charge for a few dollars. I even provide article / essay writing services which is much expensive of course, but also depending on its type.

Alrite guys. Good morning... gracias and adios ! 

P.S. You might wanna remind me to update my blog from time to time *haha* In case I forgot ;( Thx again ! Tweet me about this or whatever. >.<

Something For You To Ponder~

Why raise your anger? Think my friend…think. Anger doesn’t solve a problem. It only shakes your mind. Where has your wisdom go? Has it lay waste into your daily activities? Or has it, crumble in your weak mind? Serenity in a chaotic situation will yield a solution; it might not be the best, but it is better than none. Have you not grow up? Be independent?

Studying alone does not guarantee you a good future.

Falsehood will not safe you forever.

Faux pas will ruin your beauty.

Everything contains limitations. But your limitation is far beyond expectation. Such demonstration tonight is far too unbelievable – weak, unintelligent performance and unwise choice of words; poisoning your personality to its fullest. My friend, let not your heart stirs your thoughts but your wisdom. If you have not any wisdom, then ask from The Above who will deliver trials and temptations to you; molding you like how a potter shapes the clay. Do not hover over misconceptions or drown in its perpetuation for the wrong will have their judgments according to His time. Safeguard yourself my friend! For everyone will try to seek the truth, likewise their parents, while the wicked will perish when they least expect it.

The wrong may seem to have the upper hand for now. But as high as the squirrel jumps, it will still land on the earth. Pay no heed to the sins as Heaven is for the truth, and Hell is for the tainted soul. If you have no knowledge, seek and you shall find it. This message is addressed to you, whom name shall not be mention but you will know who you are. Hopefully, you will think again and change your character despite of your daily chores. Only then, your inner beauty will shine. Right now, you’re just a flower… losing its petal and then fade again… into the dim and sorrowful grave.

Working and Thank you.

Hi guys! Have been ages (allow me to exaggerate) lol.  Uhmm.. Well, not feeling well in the past few weeks due to severe stomachache - can't even count the amount of times I ran into toilet. Anyway, studies have been great, just that the new team I'm assigned into doesn't look good. Guess I gotta do the work with another trustful team member..more of a 2-man work instead of 5-man. Hmmm.. And also, I've been in this website Elance.com 'cuz I feel like working to cater for my financial need (as in I felt bad spending my parents' hard-earn money on entertainment). I'm a pianist, a gamer or sometimes, a collector. I might need to buy music scores, game cards, etc. So I'm hoping to get some job through this website. They're paying in $$ so convert into RM is quite a lot, at least for me. =)

Blogwalkers: TQ for inspiring me to write this post haha. I was thinking of abandoning it because apparently, my friend, most of them, left blogging long time ago. So well, thanks for your support! Will continue to write if I've the time.

If any of you need my service, please click the link below. Thanks again. Till then, BYE!!

"Dun live ur life on someone else" - Fail.

Probably, u might have experienced living ur life on someone else. Wat i mean is, all u think is for the others around u..out of love of course. But have u ever think of the purpose of u doing it? Whether it's for their own good, etc. Well, i did. I love to help around. Hate to say tat sometimes im being used, which is normal for every kind person.

At first, i would like to give up on it. I mean, think bout it. Have they ever help u back?? Do u get any benefit? How did they treat u in return? These questions.. will fail u. haha. I'll tell u why. When u help, do u help wif love or wif a hope of getting a return? Frankly, most of us help bcoz we're hoping for a payback. I think tat's entirely dumb(pardon my language). Whether u knew it or not, the person whom u've help throughout ur years or days on earth have in any way, enlighten them. ALWAYS REMEMBER: "No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of another." - Charles Dickens.

Tis is why i think tat helping one another is vital in tis world. When u fail to help, u'll automatically be categorize as "selfish", unless u're UNABLE to do tat. Well, UNABLE means a lot of things. Check for urself: "Are you disabled?";"Do u have insufficient food to eat?";"Do u have any shelter?";"Are u too poor to give out even few cents?";"Are u not capable?". I hope these helps you in deciding.

Someday, when u're sick n gonna leave the earth n meet the LORD, u might reflect on who u've help, have u been using ur love n sincerity to reach out for others n so on. Those who din help will regret when their days are numbered. Live ur life as meaningful as u can, for u'll never know ppl might help u back in future. thank you.

omg... everyday sleep at 5/6am!!!

Hi everyone! haha. long time never update~ XP sory!! haha.

Anyway, this month is a month of miracles.. why?? I began to understand lots n LOTS of things tat are vague in my past... personal to subjects.

Good news is... i will persevere to write in this blog for my uhmmm.. fans. (Well, today i've not much to talk bout.) But whoa... quite tired internally.. imagine sleeping at 5am or 6am for a week!!! thx to raya... But i reli appreciate tat i've found sumone to chat wif me lol. still kind i can say..great fren... like big brother.(im the eldest in family T.T) i dun plan to do inspection like past...it's stupid i know. haha.

Btw, i began to suspect something mystery is happening in my room... hmmm... wth is tat.. always disturb when i sleep.

Lol. Do u guys dream bout ur relatives or frens around u??? haha. i do. kip dreaming bout them. if i see u once, i'd be sure i'll dream of you. lol. Recently, my dream is coming true via time. some dreams are meant to be true.. must be a sign uh?? haha.

Anyway, gtg now.. coz i nid to attend tutorial 2molo(im in college already... yea. this blog is VERY OLD-since secondary). primary oso got i guess... may be tis one.. i edit it so many times till i loss count. BYE!!! Kip on commenting.. in wateva language XP. no worry... i'll translate it myself. haha. 

Cheers~
       D.ChAn

Wat a HECTIC DAY~~!!!

HAHA!! hi ppl!! long time no see... err... write..=.= i was bz wif my new laptop... those program stuffs.. uh-oh. headache... anyway.. thx 4 those who support the previous spanish post. thx so much.. (i've RE-COVERED good news!! =D ) anyway, im looking for the game plantvszombies together wif crack file.. anyone have suggestion? >.> coz im gonna go crazy looking 4 it!!!! hehe.

Uhmmm... sry.. i'll be updating my blog a lil late nowadays coz have to prepare myself to study at sarawak.. (far 4 u, not me). anyway, more philosophy will come as life goes by. For now, let us reflect on tis tranquil post i've prepared:



     Have u ever look in the air, or moon and take a deep taught bout how life and friends, family, everythg has done to u?? i mean, how it changes u?? OR maybe, how GOD works HIS miracle in ur life??

     Well, I have friends tat change my life and most importantly, GOD has show HIS LOVE 4 me throughout my life. I've always live alone, at least i call it. My heart and soul was not rite and always lonely, 1st glance into me was emptiness... Before i became a Christian, I do bad thgs like stealing, and etc. also, i've bad intention in every thg i do/plan. REvenge and stuff like make ppl in trouble kinda thg.. Of course, all this is unnoticeable.. Im a good kid in skool ya know?? Life changes when i shifted skool........

     I shifted to a new skool, means new life. but still doing the old immature stuff... uh-oh. the prob is im not feeling sick n tired of committing those sins. God bless me... i always say..  When im in my Form 2, a friend of mine told my mom bout the *good news* which means bout the true God. I uhmmm... kinda blur tat time. I juz follow my mom n my friend.. we when to church 4 years...

     Thgs started to change gradually. My attitude n behaviour... whoa... totally diff from be4 i met GOD!!! My mom who used to beat her children all up badly, also changed.. talk bout tis, she hasnt been beating us for years!! i mean majority, minority is once in a blue moon now.. thrown most of her "precious-devil" canes(yeap... she had more than 5 of them) away... Im so glad =D She tried to talk to us more n also understand us more.... On the other hand, me n my siblings give her a lovely-obedience attitude. Take thgs into consideration n NOT 2 upset her- her scoldings is still unchangeable.. Once u get it, it;ll rewind like a tape recorder. *sigh*

    Thought bout wat GOD has done>??? HE ans most of my prayers!!! Can u imagine??? I wanna study in sarawak, but we(my parents and i) nid to fly there 2 check out university there... prob is we'd have to waste more flight money. I prayed hard and to my surprise, THE LORD has gave me a place in my NATIONAL SERVICE in one of the camps in sarawak which is a 45 minutes drive 2 the uni!! when my parents reached there, another miraculous sign was, a lorry driver told them how to go to the remote NS camp!! yeah... road to my camp will spin ur head rgt round n round XP After tat, GOD make 2 of my camp trainers, i truly believe, they offer to help us-my parents and i to bring us to the uni. we're so HAPPY!!! Cant imagine the joy GOD was ANSWERING MY PRAYER TOTALLY!! so awesome...

     OF course, the miracle din stop there. Despite the trainers bzness, they oso offer to take me back to camp so tat my parents can fly back to kl. i mean, who would be so kind to do it without a single cent???  anyway, my parents gave them some money as treats for their kindness.. Now, the LORD has oso send me a guy in service department in the uni to help me set thgs up for my hospitality in sarawak during study.. AND ITS ALL DONE!!! haha!! PRAISE THE LORD 4 His goodness!!!

     I dunno bout u guys, but i am DEFINITELY SURE tat GOD is always wif me and always AHEAD of me, to guide me and lead me in my life. Providing me the supports i nid n everythg. I hope tat u guys will pray n i WILL pray too tat he will search 4 u all ONLY IF u'd OPEN ur HEART to HIM. Amen.

La amistad y la BFF. ¿Qué significa para usted?

Yo no sé acerca de la mayoría de ustedes. Creo que la vida es un poco injusto para la amistad. La amistad puede crecer tan fuerte que la obsesión se lleva a cabo. a veces, un fallo de cualquiera de las partes podría provocar disensión entre fraternidad. Algunos, por otra parte, en realidad hacer que se conviertan en lo BFF.

Triste para mí, ¿eh? No tengo ni qué tan siempre BFF. A menudo la gente me preguntó:

XYZ: "¿Tienes un mejor amigo?" 
me dijo: "no. BFF no existen para mí."

XYZ: "¿Por qué? Me refiero a que no se encuentre uno o qué?" 
me dijo: "Bueno, yo la última vez. que es una mierda total, porque así lo pidió me abandono. nunca duran mucho, como de costumbre".

XYZ: "Uh .. eso es triste. ¿Usted realmente entender lo que es BFF? Como en lo que es BFF para usted?" 
me dijo: "Para mí, BFF es un poco como él / ella, es muy, muy cerca de vosotros, y estará allí para ti no importa qué. No dejan a usted como si usted es una basura, a menos que los hacen hacerlo. Normalmente, BFF no lo hacemos, no importa lo malo que es. Son realmente un animador y un gran apoyo. Bueno, yo no creo que haya hecho algo para asustar a mis amigos de fuera. Estoy muy útil en mi camino ya. Justo que nadie aprecia como de costumbre. Puede ser 1 o 2. "

XYZ: "Yo veo ... puede ser que no son tus verdaderos amigos?" 
me dijo: "si usted dice que no, lo que significa decir que no voy a tener amigos en todos! Bueno, lo dijo así, tengo amigos, amigos que no les importa a mí, lo único que hacen es venir - toma de ir clase. ¿Ves?? tengo un montón de amigos tontos. Haz algo por ellos por amor y que lo pague con piedras. Yo no espero ningún pago sólo que la actitud. Bueno, admito que no soy bien en los temas. Algunos realmente hablar de juegos, porno, estudios, etc Bueno, no lo hago muy bien o conocimientos especializados o incluso el amor hablando de esto porno cosas. Peor aún, chicos tema, los juegos, yo soy como el peor? gracias?? a mi madre. Mi vida entera es aburrido, blanco y negro. Nadie va a como una persona como yo. aburrido. ¿Crees que se puede encontrar una BFF que puede soportar esta vida suya??

XYZ: "Está bien, entonces, ¿crees que puede hacer algo para traerlos de vuelta? Como en fijar su amistad??" 
me dijo: "Yo realmente no lo sé ... Lo he intentado lo mejor posible. Tal vez no se han destinado a las personas cercanas a mi alrededor."

XYZ: "espera, su familia no está cerca de usted???" 
me dijo: "no .. no tan cerca como se pueda pensar. Entre los hermanos, sí. Podemos hablar de casi cualquier cosa con ellos. en cualquier lugar que vayamos, nos atenemos a la otra. Dado que la mayoría de las veces, todo el mundo es extraño. Mi hermano y i son a tiempo parcial artista intérprete o ejecutante, por lo tanto nos encontramos con un montón de gente, especialmente la gente de Outstation. Bueno, simplemente decir, son capaces de hacernos hablar pero no de obligaciones. Creo que el lugar más lejano que se fue a Sarawak. Lo siento. .. fuera de tema. En realidad estaba esperando encontrar una BFF un día, que realmente se siente como mi hermano o hermana. Esperando, significa que todavía estoy atrapado en mi propia jaula solitaria."

XYZ: "es su personalidad bien? Como en lo que molestó a nadie antes? Esto podría afectar a su amistad sabes?" 
me dijo: "En verdad comprendo lo que quieres decir .. creo que lo hice durante SMSed. Pero no acechar, supongo. Así que encontrar más información acerca de una persona que me interesaba. mi personalidad? depende del individuo. algunos le guste, algunos tal vez no. Estoy realmente formar un lado buen chico. disciplina. Sólo rabia (muy muy muy pocas veces, soy un hombre muy paciente) y sobre-reaccionan a veces (aquí. .. la gente normalmente no me gusta). Pero estoy de tren y nació de esta manera. Justo ese día, cuando con mi amigo .. uhmm, CK y MK. Bueno, antes de la fiesta, como en unos pocos días antes de la fiesta, CK todavía la respuesta de mi mensajes, hablar, etc Luego, durante el partido, todo el mundo los juegos de azar (es CNY, duh ~) y me gusta la soledad, observando, no unirse. La razón es porque mi hermana estaba allí junto a mí. Es malo para un hermano para jugar frente a de su hermana. Mi familia, nosotros los hermanos, especialmente nunca jugar con dinero real antes, ¿ves?? Así que de repente .. espero que comprendan."


XYZ: "Wow, eres realmente un buen chico. ¿Piensas alguna vez / intenta cambiar para sus amigos?" 
me dijo: "Sí, claro. pero me temo que no puedo. Cuando las cosas llegan, sólo hay una posibilidad de que usted puede hacer. Después de eso, tendría que esperar a que pase por el nuevo. Pensé que el suicidio podría ser mejor. Por eso, ellos vendrán a visitarme por última vez, ¿ves? imaginar la sala de hospital llena de todos mis amigos. haha. Bromas solamente. Nunca va a suceder en el camino. Me gustaría hacer algo si que, ya sabes me daría otra oportunidad de hacerlo."

XYZ: "suicidio?!?! NO. Eso no es bueno! Terminar con su vida siempre lastimar a otros." 
me dijo: "le hacen daño a causa de mí?! hmmm .. yo no lo creo."

XYZ: "Bueno, eso depende de lo cerca que están con ellos. Así, esto es todo por hoy a nuestro cuestionario. Pero me gustaría decir, es posible que sufren depresión grave, la confusión y la enfermedad psicológica. Tus amigos deberían tomar nota de su miseria y problemas. "
me dijo: "no te preocupes. recé todo el tiempo y se han recuperado de esta enfermedad. por lo menos, me gustaría disminuir los problemas. algunos lo hacen tomar nota y, obviamente, algunos no le importaba en absoluto. Estoy bien con eso . Una cosa más, no siempre le digo a la gente acerca de mis problemas. Mi mente es muy fija también, cuando digo que no quiere decir no. que es lo que estoy de tren, mientras que para todo esto. A veces en la noche, cuando estoy estresado , sólo voy a tomar un poco de sangre antes de dormir. Verás, yo piel mis labios cuando no estoy en un estado de ánimo, subrayó arriba o tan enojado que no arremeter contra nadie, sólo por diversión / sed también consiguió. Tal vez usted me llama loco o demente, no lo sé. "
  
XYZ: "oh .. ok. Eso es muy perturbar con sangre. Espero que usted recibirá una BFF y al final de su muy miseria y problemas tan pronto como sea posible. Para sus amigos por ahí, por favor cuide de él, bien. De c Ourse, encontrar un amigo es fácil, pero para obtener una BFF es realmente tan difícil como encontrar una aguja en un pajar. Gracias. "

Kinda like an interview or something. Even Kriss Allen's song - Live like We're Dying brings a deep meaning into our life. Thx Kris. We must always appreciate and care for others around us, our love ones, friends and family, etc. Because we dun know when they'll go. Better be sory than regret when they're gone.

Happy CNY.... Comes and go.

CNY was nvr excited to me.. Let's see.. I got like RMXX oni. The rest is for parents(parents know y). I dunno, for most ppl, chinese especially, tis occasion is splendid. Me? Boring.. no offence. So, well, be4 these, at least, they're ppl of love still around you but today, 12pm they juz disappeared, vanished!! Of course, cant blame them, im the one tat's not close@good with anybody. Even if i was, who cares??? Did anybody remember wat i've help u through in ur prob, how i solve a silly-terrible friendship tat's totally not my prob!! God knows. Maybe i've disappointed u, scared u for not joining in tat CNY fun activity. NVM, im used to it. Sry.. i get it. Im a wind rite? Come n go. I've a family tat dun und a teenage's feelings n lifestyle. HAha. Well, at least teacher's the oni one who can und me. Exasperated by parents during hols, events, occasions, almost EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!

Cant i have a normal family? Sumtimes, i'd look below at the 4th floor, any place high enough, n asked "will die ah if jump dwn?" My classmates, the saw me most of the time looking below wif hollow, lifeless eyes. I thought tat by suicide, i wouldnt suffer much. Base on my background n some probs, u probably, by now should've said "I think tis guy is facing a serious depression." If not, u'll think i'm an AS but LOA i supposed. Who would've see wat my real life was? I'm always trying to cheer myself after all thgs tat've inflicted on me. A person like me; lonely, lifeless, solitude, cool, sumtimes expressionless, scary, moody, emo at times, crazy2, yada yada. At times, i thought of running away from hme. But it's a stupid thg wasnt it? Where can i live??? Wat's weird is tat even my frens said i should've done it. They nvr think tat i've no place to live. Freedom is yet to unfold in my life. I dun share sumthg common in ppl simply bcoz im growing up in a TOTALLY DIFF environment from wat ppl of my age suppose to. Concern? Dun be. Who would concern such traumatic ppl like me, huh??!!

Until u understand me, i might be gone from tis world. I've always wanted a "family". Tat's y i treated u guys like my brothers and sisters, even at times u get me wrong, lash at me, hated me and etc. Frankly speaking, im reli jealous of those birds flying above our heads everyday. I eman they're juz... uhmm.. free. Haiz... Pls pray tat i'll get out from my cage n find a flock of family tat i can fly together one day. Seriously, i dun mid ppl calling me Dick or wateva, as long as it doesnt "lock" me. - FATAL.

L.O.L.X

I cant believe my computer is so cacat nowadays... Even the connection oso cacat. Btw, hi ppl. long time no see. I couldnt believe my eyes tat my counter is rising even though i nvr touch tis blog for years??? ;D

Anyways, CNY's coming. Even PYP is busy. i say my group Araunah is having a BBQ+Swimming at my friends hse. I got to know tat most of u(i mean the ex-form5's) are shaking legs at hme! so, i've invitedand inviting most of u to join us in our Petra Youth Production in my church. Always welcome newcomers. haha. So, if u wanna come, comment me. or juz leave a post in my chatbox. OR send email to me.

my email: dongdongdong71@yahoo.com

cheers,

Derrick@rick

FRIENDSHIP REFLECTION

I know tis is a little weird, but... since my last time and sight on u guys was during SPM, I will take tis opportunity to express my thought which I've kept for years... ONE BY ONE... <> Plus, if in the future... when I leave u guys and the world... This could be the last message of me to each and every one of u...

IVAN CHEW -> The first time I saw you, I saw you as a guy of attraction. I'm sure majority have the same thought as I am. Noe? Perhaps you've achieved a requirement of a "perfect" friend. No matter how much you self-praise urself, u still have friends surround you... dunno why. Anyway, you're the only one who can tolerate me among the 3 of you(KY, ZH and u).. Thx for helping me out when I'm scolded by KY and ZH for (u know...) Lol. I appreciate it a lot. Just a lil' comment, you should change ur attitude to be more helpful in times of trouble juz like how ppl treat you when u're in trouble... I remember during the Moral project, last day where u guys nid to hand it to Pn. Noria. Do u remember?? ZH and KY are asking for ur help adn u ignored them greatly. Pls Ivan. Dun do tis to ur friends. I'm sure you'll get more ppl around you if you can stop or lessen ur self praise too. Pei Sun always say "Self-praise is a no praise." K?? =S


KEE YI -> Perhaps you're a good brother in our group. Although you always scold me, but I've always learn sumthg. Thx. I still remember when we're in Form4, you thought me one of your concepts in life I suppose:"stay out of trouble." Still remember you told me, "Derrick, dun care wat ppl do. It's not ur business. Dun give urself into the trouble." Actually I was juz trying to help.. but problem always come about. May be u've forgotten. But you've make me think twice when you wrote the essay abour LOVE. Seriously, I never expect sumthg original like tis from u. Bravo i should say! When I read tat essay, I felt touch and a lil' terasa. Tat's why I kept asking you to put it on ur blog so tat I can read it as often as I can... it's an art. Oh bro, thx for lending me ur Ipod too.. You've fulfill my hope and dream to own an Ipod for sooo long.(eventhough I never own it, but I get to touch and hold it for very long I can say. TQ.) Of course, when there are pros, there are cons. I can say u're a person tat does not appreciate what ppl do for you. You and ZH can be adik-beradik, yat tam2. Haha! Both having the same attitude but ZH better. LOL. I remember in Form4, I help the 3 of you to take you guys' bag down from the 3rd floor(our class) to the 1st floor(IT room). Only Ivan said thank you. U guys never say a word. Juz "orr..". You should change tis attitude. And you'll be a perfect friend if you dun easily hooked with the wrong friend(u know who la...). Lastly, dun hold grudges on anyone for a long period. It's bad for ur health, ya? Hehe. =D


ZHAN HONG -> Uhmm... you are? Wait... have been sitting beside me for about 2 or 3 years i guess.. I can't say alot bout ya.. Since you dun have your own concept. Juz blurr... and a follower(say nicely) I should say. A betrayer when comes to fighting for marks (I'm sure u can recall wat u did to me, dun u??) Plus, you also should be parient to anyone you come in contact with. Remember!! Be patient to those who had been patient with you over the years! A lot of saying and scoldings, but there's learning throughout the process. "When ppl ask you to do, you juz do la..." See? Isn't this a concept of a follower??? Still, u instill obedience in me indirectly. U thought me wat my mom thought me sumtimes.. "Do without complain."(though u did not sumtimes... hypocrite eh?) Last advice to u, I realized and hope u could change to urself is BE LOYAL. Thx for tolerating wif me in ur Hot-tempered attitude. Thx buddy.


MAX HOH -> Hah!! My spiritual brother! Although there was a major problem happened between both of us in skool due to tat... uhmm... embarrassing.. =C, still God answered my prayer tat our relationship was fix juz when u came back from ur F1 camp. If there's an award- giving-day held by me, I would definitely award you with the "Philosopher" medal. I call you PhF(Friends of Philosophy) . Yes, it's true. You've encouraged me in my life quite a lot. When I'm in too high in too high and think everythg can be done my way, you gave me a blow, saying, "Derrick, when you can do sumthg, dun think others can... they're not u.. Everyone have their own abilities, k?? " I also learnt and am encouraged when I'm down with friendship problem- Prom thg. You told me, "Friends are there for you to cherish and treasure. If you dun, you'll get ntg." Thx for everythg bro. Ppl always say I hated you for wat you did to me in the past, but the fact is I salute you more than other thg and anyone else in our skool, honestly. I dunno wat to say anymore.. could be tears rolling down my cheek. Juz wanna give a piece of advice: You should control ur arms... not to simply swing it around or on any gals' shoulder. Not all gals like it.(eg: Joey) Today, I can proudly say tat you are the one God sent to assist me in my life... THX BRO!!! =D

* I WILL WRITE MORE. I WONT FORGET EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU... I'LL WRITE AS LONG AS I'M CAPABLE.. AS LONG AS GOD ALLOWS....

Hmm... Accepting new perspectives~

Fiuh... Thx for those who has comforted me durinbg my times of trouble.. Rite now, I'm learning to accept diff(way too diff) thoughts and be patient wif my uhmm.. frens.. But.. I know how u guys treated me.. still the worse... however, i'll still be patient(i hope so) as long as i can... Hope some of u dun take this oppurtunity to step my head.. I know i can be good... but U dun wan to see me being emo, rite?? LOL. =.="

Tears of Blue Sky

Alone in the darkness, I found out the meaning of my tears,

I stepped out toward the place I wished for, but I don't want to hurt anyone,

Today, the wind that crosses the ocean will blow straight toward tomorrow again,

But why can't my heart start moving?

I wonder that fate awaits me,

I don't want to regret having been born,

There is courage within sadness,

I believe that I can find the light,

Tears of blue sky, still falling,

Someday it will change into a smile.

The wind that I chase after at a fast pace slips through between my fingers,

I'm still afraid to trust, but I will no longer linger,

The moon softly taps my shoulder; the water's surface shows the path of the moon,

It makes me forget that I was confused,

Even if there is nothing waiting for me tomorrow,

I still have hands that can make something,

I can even change the fated path,

Now I build up my strong feelings,

Tears of blue sky, overflowing,

The sky will be clear tomorrow.

I should be able to step toward the path

I've looked up to,

I can go anywhere, as long as I don't lose myself,

The tranquility is what I seek,

for this day reflects the better life I'm shooting to.

I knew I am alone... I'll always be...It's different now...

I thank you for the suppot u guys trying to give... but at times... I think peisun understands how i felt.. Ur sry might mean somethg to me... but sorry... It doesn't work on me... I've receive too much "sorry".. So fake...

Lonely... part of my life... seems to be like a wolf... wandering alone in the forest

searching for partners but find nothin.

Perhaps... I'm wat i am.. ppl cant accept me...

I understand... Mixing with wrong groups, may be?

I still remember the good old days i have with my friends...

but tat was long ago... I dumb those sweet memories into my "rubbish bin".

It's different now...

Alas!! The old cheerful guy has changed into someone serious(i guess)...

Immune to jokes(most of the time)..

Trying to fake his laughters..

To ignore bad times...

Well, it doesn't change him at all!!!

Friends... they only care among themselves,

The rest... i should say, busybody? (u know who u are..)

Prom night wasn't the best thg ever...

It doesnt excite me nor ignite my spirit..,

In fact, think twice, not going's better than going..

I know.. once im there.. i'll be left out.. again..

Since ppl ady doing tis to me in skool,,

I might juz expect the same in prom..

Since i feel like living skool...

I never thought deep bout my friends..

During old crips,

I'll always look forward into coming to skool,

Now..., everything changes..

Supportive or not... I'm expressing myself..

I know a lot of ppl dislike me..

Before i get a post...

i imagine a great num of friends...

But i dun choose tis myself.,

U guys who indirectly forced me to,

Before i agree on taking tis post,

I knew the consequences.. I knew it..

After all, i can afford to lose friends.. rgt?

Oh.. I already lose one of them..

Wat's the diff. losing all?

Perhaps,.. IF im given a new life...

I hope i wouldnt be like tis...

I hope im not being used..

I hope im appreciated...

I hope life would be like a leaf surface..

I hope someone.. somebody will be true to me...

I dreamt often,

dream of ppl around me...

dream of ppl who r good/kind to me..

dream of ppl who are bad to me...

dream of angriness, violent, happy, cheerful,

solemn, cruelty, evil, silence...

dream of all tis thoughts which are still playing

in my mind today.. till now...

One thg one dun understand bout me...

I grew up in a very diff environment...

Im sure its diff from most of u...

I dun get freedom as often i like...

Im tied to rules... discipline...

Maybe a lil' slack here and there...

but still, i'm diff.. ppl dun accept me as who i am.

Anyway, all tis was juz dreams and hopes,

they would never come true...

even they will,

someone muz have started somethg..

I dun believe much on ppl.. wat they say..

they betray their own words...

And my innocent ear believe... Such a fool!!!

From then on, to even trust someone like u guys,

its hard.. although supports are given..

They're all faking it...

But all tis are juz hopes and dreams...

U guys search for fun while i'm still in my cage..

waiting to be released..

Sobbing while delivering tis pathetic message..

I'd never return to reality if i am given a chance..

Ppl in my fantasy world are better than now~~~

Am i not human?

I am very dissapointed by their act as friends....
Why muz i be treated differently? Am i not juz a norm human like u guys?
Why muz i be treated like an alien?!
I came into tis world to seek friendship and peace,
But all i get's destruction and insanity of heart-stabbing attack
from neighbourhood in class!
Now... i could not tell who's my friend and who's not.
Awhile when rain takes it place in tis serenity, i felt like a tiny ant in tis world...
I'm bound into the abyss of sadness..

I dun understand the way of life...
Is treating others good make me someone different?
To me, i personally think tat ppl treat me differently bcoz im being somone different...
Too kind... too good in "proper speech".. bla3...
I am who i am.. for awhile... i thought tat "Am i born to be alone?" I wander....
ME and my friends... like the heavens and hell,.. a chasm separating us...
No wander... It doesnt seems tat wat i've learned so far are false...
It's true tat im not trustable.... as well as others..

I learned tat ppl are not given any chance in life..
Oni God will... but that's in the spiritual world...
Satan's oni target is devouring humans...
Im not gonna fall into his trap..,
juz tat i will remain quite myself...
May be wat MKY said was true...
I am born to be quite and lonely myself...
Friends now are part of my life(u are rgt.. but)...
Friends in college doesnt make any difference at all(at least i hope not)..
I know i cant join u guys in everythg.. not tat im not good at it...
but i am also a boat.. i'm control by a force.. unlike u ppl..
Im also defensive.. I dont come often and join u guys...
I think tat, makes a difference between my world and ur world.

Why me?

Why must u aim at me? Is it becoz u and ur bball robots dislike me(all thx to ur influences). Its ur double-edged sword-like tongue who coz u end up suffering in miseries... not me... nor anyone... U r ditched not becoz of who we r but bcoz of who u r, NOW.... ~~~ Solution is wat u nid... but sincerity is wat WE needed MOST.. Hope u understand... U still have 4 months from now to change... actually. Think bout it.

Spoiled.... "Speeding" in class..

Haih... u guys shouldnt have "speed" in class so much... nanti terLanggar in SPM baru tau...


haih... ah ling!! Y u appear in my group.?. such a spoiler///... XD


Still, ur xpression dint convince me.... u should do wat u say yesterday.... Kip ur words pls~ If u dun wanna lose... any friend of urs... unless u're using us.... me... then... u think urself... i know my primary and secondary cant blend together... but still... i'm learning how to let thgs pass.... we'll talk more... maybe today... not every1 will act like me.. (u know wat i'm saying IF u read tis.)


Hmm... i see he's spoiling u as well... watch out!!! Hisses everywhere......


Hey sam, i'll try to help him... but not too close... ok? hope u accept tis idea of mine.... Well, i guess he dun wanna be too close either. Noe?

Way to Go!!!

Today... very funny.... We tumpang Zhanhong's car to his hse then to tuition... Well, report card day wasn't tat bad for me after all... For this time... Oh ya... Now we(Ivan, me, Keeyi and jeremy) know where Zhanhong stay liao... hehehe... and we also expect the unexpected.

When we reach there, we play PS2, keeyi as usual... WonderGirls 1st. Oh... i finally get to listen to wonder girls' "nobody" song. quite nice... at least, not like wat i've imagine earlier... based on his singing. Lolx.

We played lots of games, including Naruto(I always win), Bleach(haih.. I taught keeyi well till he beat Ivan), Dragonball(master Jeremy) and football(Zhanhong-2;Jeremy-1) -> suppose Jer win but i dunno... Well, u should see how Jer's face lks like... Serious weh!!!

Then, at 1.30pm, Zhanhong said it's time to leave... guess wat??? Ivan and keeyi said "one more match" on the Bleach game. Pity him... He's late to tuition... thx to Mr.W.Girls and Mr.Perasan. Surprizingly, Kyeli oso going to tuition, summore same subject... She's oso late. Haha!!! so ngam!! So, he got teman lo... IF not her, i dun think Zhanhong will go... He might as well join us in Wong Si Nai. >>skip>>skip>>skip>> After finishing our food, we head to Newplus and wait for keeyi to go LRT(heng dai ma. Lol.)

Oh... be4 this, Ivan's having his short nap in Wong Si Nai. Everyone eat till like so cham... Coz full liao(coz we ate ivan's breads... uhmm.. sounds wrong??) Then, we head straight to Martin, Sejarah-Salihah. Whoa!!! I'm like dying slowly in the class... Can u imagine?? She's teaching bout economic? FELDA, FELCRA, MARA, RIDA... blablabla... Guess wat? Salihah saw Ivan sleeping... So, ivan, for the 2nd time kena quiz... Hehe.

>>skip>>skip>>skip>>

Yay!!! Time to go back!!! I felt like i've revived from death... Fiuhh~ But hor, me and ivan sakit perut later... I think i ate too much of the mentos ivan bought....its like drugs u see... to prevent me from sleeping... or i'll end up like sleeping beauty... bound in dreams forever.. HAHAHA!!(so funny..) Alrighty!! I'll have to end here. More updates coming...(i hope so...)

What a morning "glory"...

Today... early in the morning... i went to skool and got everybody's face sad... Guess wat? I started with our library's honorable punishment.. the Librarian Community Service(LCS)... Here, i would like to apologize to these few ppl... Not tat i'm mean... i'm juz being "cold"... after the incident... By the way... following up will be warning letters, ya?

1. Joey(sry gal.... gotta be strict a bit... u gotta rememba to pass me the letter nex time..)

2. Nikhita(not tat i'm mean... i did advised u to give me a letter.. u din..)

3. Gaaya("bagus".. nvr even see u for weeks!)

4. To others: U guys deserved it... for not coming for duties....

Well, at least u can say tat Derrick.. H.O.Discipline is doing his responsibilities. Or else, u dun wan me to sit and shake my leg.. Do ya?

It Flows like A River... Down the Stream....

Haih... another holidays.. passed....
I dream of a lot of thgs... Someone i know... Sad.. happy... U named it..
Well, holidays are full of works...
My time juz flow into the river... eternally condemned... chasm breakage..
I hope time can be reversed... So tht my dreams will stay eternally...
Living in my fantasy... con moto... lacrimoso... agento...

HaPpy BiRtHDaY Br0ThEr DaViD

Yo bro!! HaPpy BiRtHDaY Br0ThEr DaViD!! Haha.. Wish u again and again.. HAih.. Until 12 o'clock... jking la... Oh.. Am i the 1st?? OH ya...

You're my mentor,
my idol[i'm not the oni 1... some like... j.lee oso said tis(i think he terpaksa).],
my big bro and....
Haha.. friends and brothers 4eva!!! XD

Hope u always smile(should've said tis to myself-.-")!!
Happy 4eva, with Lydia of course!!
AND MaY G0d BlEsS YoU iN YoUR DaiLy LiFe!!!

A PRESENT FOR U...

Here in the midst
of a lonely abyss
A single joy I find...
your presence in my mind.
Alone I dare not climb...
with you I reach new heights.
The tides of life run in and out, and are often very choppy
Look towards the horizon and know that your waters will be calm once more.
You are as delightful as daffodils or a purring kitten,
Let's get together soon,
cause friends like you make the world a special place!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Life is a carnival of fleeting light and dance
but playing, living and laughing together can make it last.
Wonder of wonders is a friend like you!
We have a history,
the kind that reaches far into the past,
and promises that in the future we'll remain friends...
forever.
Here's wishing you, my friend, a world of wonder,
Cast the gift of a lovely thought
into the heart of a friend.
I'm so glad we're friends, again!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Sometimes when we talk,
I begin to feel like so many things are still possible.
That it's OK to believe I can do the things I dream of.
A lot of times I feel so much better after spending time with you,
it's one of the reasons I'm glad to call you my friend!
Thinking of you and hoping you're staying out of trouble.
The stars are in your favor,
true hearts on your side!
Thinking of you with love today--
just like every day!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Nestled in my special corner
I think of good times shared with you.
The sea can wash away
everything but the memories will last,
as ours is a friendship that plays like a symphony...
lasting wherever we are..
Our hearts bind together,
forming infinite bonds--
a never ending friendship.
You make my world a little brighter!
You are my family and my friend,
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Cao first!!!