FRIENDSHIP REFLECTION

I know tis is a little weird, but... since my last time and sight on u guys was during SPM, I will take tis opportunity to express my thought which I've kept for years... ONE BY ONE... <> Plus, if in the future... when I leave u guys and the world... This could be the last message of me to each and every one of u...

IVAN CHEW -> The first time I saw you, I saw you as a guy of attraction. I'm sure majority have the same thought as I am. Noe? Perhaps you've achieved a requirement of a "perfect" friend. No matter how much you self-praise urself, u still have friends surround you... dunno why. Anyway, you're the only one who can tolerate me among the 3 of you(KY, ZH and u).. Thx for helping me out when I'm scolded by KY and ZH for (u know...) Lol. I appreciate it a lot. Just a lil' comment, you should change ur attitude to be more helpful in times of trouble juz like how ppl treat you when u're in trouble... I remember during the Moral project, last day where u guys nid to hand it to Pn. Noria. Do u remember?? ZH and KY are asking for ur help adn u ignored them greatly. Pls Ivan. Dun do tis to ur friends. I'm sure you'll get more ppl around you if you can stop or lessen ur self praise too. Pei Sun always say "Self-praise is a no praise." K?? =S


KEE YI -> Perhaps you're a good brother in our group. Although you always scold me, but I've always learn sumthg. Thx. I still remember when we're in Form4, you thought me one of your concepts in life I suppose:"stay out of trouble." Still remember you told me, "Derrick, dun care wat ppl do. It's not ur business. Dun give urself into the trouble." Actually I was juz trying to help.. but problem always come about. May be u've forgotten. But you've make me think twice when you wrote the essay abour LOVE. Seriously, I never expect sumthg original like tis from u. Bravo i should say! When I read tat essay, I felt touch and a lil' terasa. Tat's why I kept asking you to put it on ur blog so tat I can read it as often as I can... it's an art. Oh bro, thx for lending me ur Ipod too.. You've fulfill my hope and dream to own an Ipod for sooo long.(eventhough I never own it, but I get to touch and hold it for very long I can say. TQ.) Of course, when there are pros, there are cons. I can say u're a person tat does not appreciate what ppl do for you. You and ZH can be adik-beradik, yat tam2. Haha! Both having the same attitude but ZH better. LOL. I remember in Form4, I help the 3 of you to take you guys' bag down from the 3rd floor(our class) to the 1st floor(IT room). Only Ivan said thank you. U guys never say a word. Juz "orr..". You should change tis attitude. And you'll be a perfect friend if you dun easily hooked with the wrong friend(u know who la...). Lastly, dun hold grudges on anyone for a long period. It's bad for ur health, ya? Hehe. =D


ZHAN HONG -> Uhmm... you are? Wait... have been sitting beside me for about 2 or 3 years i guess.. I can't say alot bout ya.. Since you dun have your own concept. Juz blurr... and a follower(say nicely) I should say. A betrayer when comes to fighting for marks (I'm sure u can recall wat u did to me, dun u??) Plus, you also should be parient to anyone you come in contact with. Remember!! Be patient to those who had been patient with you over the years! A lot of saying and scoldings, but there's learning throughout the process. "When ppl ask you to do, you juz do la..." See? Isn't this a concept of a follower??? Still, u instill obedience in me indirectly. U thought me wat my mom thought me sumtimes.. "Do without complain."(though u did not sumtimes... hypocrite eh?) Last advice to u, I realized and hope u could change to urself is BE LOYAL. Thx for tolerating wif me in ur Hot-tempered attitude. Thx buddy.


MAX HOH -> Hah!! My spiritual brother! Although there was a major problem happened between both of us in skool due to tat... uhmm... embarrassing.. =C, still God answered my prayer tat our relationship was fix juz when u came back from ur F1 camp. If there's an award- giving-day held by me, I would definitely award you with the "Philosopher" medal. I call you PhF(Friends of Philosophy) . Yes, it's true. You've encouraged me in my life quite a lot. When I'm in too high in too high and think everythg can be done my way, you gave me a blow, saying, "Derrick, when you can do sumthg, dun think others can... they're not u.. Everyone have their own abilities, k?? " I also learnt and am encouraged when I'm down with friendship problem- Prom thg. You told me, "Friends are there for you to cherish and treasure. If you dun, you'll get ntg." Thx for everythg bro. Ppl always say I hated you for wat you did to me in the past, but the fact is I salute you more than other thg and anyone else in our skool, honestly. I dunno wat to say anymore.. could be tears rolling down my cheek. Juz wanna give a piece of advice: You should control ur arms... not to simply swing it around or on any gals' shoulder. Not all gals like it.(eg: Joey) Today, I can proudly say tat you are the one God sent to assist me in my life... THX BRO!!! =D

* I WILL WRITE MORE. I WONT FORGET EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU... I'LL WRITE AS LONG AS I'M CAPABLE.. AS LONG AS GOD ALLOWS....

Hmm... Accepting new perspectives~

Fiuh... Thx for those who has comforted me durinbg my times of trouble.. Rite now, I'm learning to accept diff(way too diff) thoughts and be patient wif my uhmm.. frens.. But.. I know how u guys treated me.. still the worse... however, i'll still be patient(i hope so) as long as i can... Hope some of u dun take this oppurtunity to step my head.. I know i can be good... but U dun wan to see me being emo, rite?? LOL. =.="

Tears of Blue Sky

Alone in the darkness, I found out the meaning of my tears,

I stepped out toward the place I wished for, but I don't want to hurt anyone,

Today, the wind that crosses the ocean will blow straight toward tomorrow again,

But why can't my heart start moving?

I wonder that fate awaits me,

I don't want to regret having been born,

There is courage within sadness,

I believe that I can find the light,

Tears of blue sky, still falling,

Someday it will change into a smile.

The wind that I chase after at a fast pace slips through between my fingers,

I'm still afraid to trust, but I will no longer linger,

The moon softly taps my shoulder; the water's surface shows the path of the moon,

It makes me forget that I was confused,

Even if there is nothing waiting for me tomorrow,

I still have hands that can make something,

I can even change the fated path,

Now I build up my strong feelings,

Tears of blue sky, overflowing,

The sky will be clear tomorrow.

I should be able to step toward the path

I've looked up to,

I can go anywhere, as long as I don't lose myself,

The tranquility is what I seek,

for this day reflects the better life I'm shooting to.

I knew I am alone... I'll always be...It's different now...

I thank you for the suppot u guys trying to give... but at times... I think peisun understands how i felt.. Ur sry might mean somethg to me... but sorry... It doesn't work on me... I've receive too much "sorry".. So fake...

Lonely... part of my life... seems to be like a wolf... wandering alone in the forest

searching for partners but find nothin.

Perhaps... I'm wat i am.. ppl cant accept me...

I understand... Mixing with wrong groups, may be?

I still remember the good old days i have with my friends...

but tat was long ago... I dumb those sweet memories into my "rubbish bin".

It's different now...

Alas!! The old cheerful guy has changed into someone serious(i guess)...

Immune to jokes(most of the time)..

Trying to fake his laughters..

To ignore bad times...

Well, it doesn't change him at all!!!

Friends... they only care among themselves,

The rest... i should say, busybody? (u know who u are..)

Prom night wasn't the best thg ever...

It doesnt excite me nor ignite my spirit..,

In fact, think twice, not going's better than going..

I know.. once im there.. i'll be left out.. again..

Since ppl ady doing tis to me in skool,,

I might juz expect the same in prom..

Since i feel like living skool...

I never thought deep bout my friends..

During old crips,

I'll always look forward into coming to skool,

Now..., everything changes..

Supportive or not... I'm expressing myself..

I know a lot of ppl dislike me..

Before i get a post...

i imagine a great num of friends...

But i dun choose tis myself.,

U guys who indirectly forced me to,

Before i agree on taking tis post,

I knew the consequences.. I knew it..

After all, i can afford to lose friends.. rgt?

Oh.. I already lose one of them..

Wat's the diff. losing all?

Perhaps,.. IF im given a new life...

I hope i wouldnt be like tis...

I hope im not being used..

I hope im appreciated...

I hope life would be like a leaf surface..

I hope someone.. somebody will be true to me...

I dreamt often,

dream of ppl around me...

dream of ppl who r good/kind to me..

dream of ppl who are bad to me...

dream of angriness, violent, happy, cheerful,

solemn, cruelty, evil, silence...

dream of all tis thoughts which are still playing

in my mind today.. till now...

One thg one dun understand bout me...

I grew up in a very diff environment...

Im sure its diff from most of u...

I dun get freedom as often i like...

Im tied to rules... discipline...

Maybe a lil' slack here and there...

but still, i'm diff.. ppl dun accept me as who i am.

Anyway, all tis was juz dreams and hopes,

they would never come true...

even they will,

someone muz have started somethg..

I dun believe much on ppl.. wat they say..

they betray their own words...

And my innocent ear believe... Such a fool!!!

From then on, to even trust someone like u guys,

its hard.. although supports are given..

They're all faking it...

But all tis are juz hopes and dreams...

U guys search for fun while i'm still in my cage..

waiting to be released..

Sobbing while delivering tis pathetic message..

I'd never return to reality if i am given a chance..

Ppl in my fantasy world are better than now~~~

Am i not human?

I am very dissapointed by their act as friends....
Why muz i be treated differently? Am i not juz a norm human like u guys?
Why muz i be treated like an alien?!
I came into tis world to seek friendship and peace,
But all i get's destruction and insanity of heart-stabbing attack
from neighbourhood in class!
Now... i could not tell who's my friend and who's not.
Awhile when rain takes it place in tis serenity, i felt like a tiny ant in tis world...
I'm bound into the abyss of sadness..

I dun understand the way of life...
Is treating others good make me someone different?
To me, i personally think tat ppl treat me differently bcoz im being somone different...
Too kind... too good in "proper speech".. bla3...
I am who i am.. for awhile... i thought tat "Am i born to be alone?" I wander....
ME and my friends... like the heavens and hell,.. a chasm separating us...
No wander... It doesnt seems tat wat i've learned so far are false...
It's true tat im not trustable.... as well as others..

I learned tat ppl are not given any chance in life..
Oni God will... but that's in the spiritual world...
Satan's oni target is devouring humans...
Im not gonna fall into his trap..,
juz tat i will remain quite myself...
May be wat MKY said was true...
I am born to be quite and lonely myself...
Friends now are part of my life(u are rgt.. but)...
Friends in college doesnt make any difference at all(at least i hope not)..
I know i cant join u guys in everythg.. not tat im not good at it...
but i am also a boat.. i'm control by a force.. unlike u ppl..
Im also defensive.. I dont come often and join u guys...
I think tat, makes a difference between my world and ur world.

Why me?

Why must u aim at me? Is it becoz u and ur bball robots dislike me(all thx to ur influences). Its ur double-edged sword-like tongue who coz u end up suffering in miseries... not me... nor anyone... U r ditched not becoz of who we r but bcoz of who u r, NOW.... ~~~ Solution is wat u nid... but sincerity is wat WE needed MOST.. Hope u understand... U still have 4 months from now to change... actually. Think bout it.

Spoiled.... "Speeding" in class..

Haih... u guys shouldnt have "speed" in class so much... nanti terLanggar in SPM baru tau...


haih... ah ling!! Y u appear in my group.?. such a spoiler///... XD


Still, ur xpression dint convince me.... u should do wat u say yesterday.... Kip ur words pls~ If u dun wanna lose... any friend of urs... unless u're using us.... me... then... u think urself... i know my primary and secondary cant blend together... but still... i'm learning how to let thgs pass.... we'll talk more... maybe today... not every1 will act like me.. (u know wat i'm saying IF u read tis.)


Hmm... i see he's spoiling u as well... watch out!!! Hisses everywhere......


Hey sam, i'll try to help him... but not too close... ok? hope u accept tis idea of mine.... Well, i guess he dun wanna be too close either. Noe?

Way to Go!!!

Today... very funny.... We tumpang Zhanhong's car to his hse then to tuition... Well, report card day wasn't tat bad for me after all... For this time... Oh ya... Now we(Ivan, me, Keeyi and jeremy) know where Zhanhong stay liao... hehehe... and we also expect the unexpected.

When we reach there, we play PS2, keeyi as usual... WonderGirls 1st. Oh... i finally get to listen to wonder girls' "nobody" song. quite nice... at least, not like wat i've imagine earlier... based on his singing. Lolx.

We played lots of games, including Naruto(I always win), Bleach(haih.. I taught keeyi well till he beat Ivan), Dragonball(master Jeremy) and football(Zhanhong-2;Jeremy-1) -> suppose Jer win but i dunno... Well, u should see how Jer's face lks like... Serious weh!!!

Then, at 1.30pm, Zhanhong said it's time to leave... guess wat??? Ivan and keeyi said "one more match" on the Bleach game. Pity him... He's late to tuition... thx to Mr.W.Girls and Mr.Perasan. Surprizingly, Kyeli oso going to tuition, summore same subject... She's oso late. Haha!!! so ngam!! So, he got teman lo... IF not her, i dun think Zhanhong will go... He might as well join us in Wong Si Nai. >>skip>>skip>>skip>> After finishing our food, we head to Newplus and wait for keeyi to go LRT(heng dai ma. Lol.)

Oh... be4 this, Ivan's having his short nap in Wong Si Nai. Everyone eat till like so cham... Coz full liao(coz we ate ivan's breads... uhmm.. sounds wrong??) Then, we head straight to Martin, Sejarah-Salihah. Whoa!!! I'm like dying slowly in the class... Can u imagine?? She's teaching bout economic? FELDA, FELCRA, MARA, RIDA... blablabla... Guess wat? Salihah saw Ivan sleeping... So, ivan, for the 2nd time kena quiz... Hehe.

>>skip>>skip>>skip>>

Yay!!! Time to go back!!! I felt like i've revived from death... Fiuhh~ But hor, me and ivan sakit perut later... I think i ate too much of the mentos ivan bought....its like drugs u see... to prevent me from sleeping... or i'll end up like sleeping beauty... bound in dreams forever.. HAHAHA!!(so funny..) Alrighty!! I'll have to end here. More updates coming...(i hope so...)

What a morning "glory"...

Today... early in the morning... i went to skool and got everybody's face sad... Guess wat? I started with our library's honorable punishment.. the Librarian Community Service(LCS)... Here, i would like to apologize to these few ppl... Not tat i'm mean... i'm juz being "cold"... after the incident... By the way... following up will be warning letters, ya?

1. Joey(sry gal.... gotta be strict a bit... u gotta rememba to pass me the letter nex time..)

2. Nikhita(not tat i'm mean... i did advised u to give me a letter.. u din..)

3. Gaaya("bagus".. nvr even see u for weeks!)

4. To others: U guys deserved it... for not coming for duties....

Well, at least u can say tat Derrick.. H.O.Discipline is doing his responsibilities. Or else, u dun wan me to sit and shake my leg.. Do ya?

It Flows like A River... Down the Stream....

Haih... another holidays.. passed....
I dream of a lot of thgs... Someone i know... Sad.. happy... U named it..
Well, holidays are full of works...
My time juz flow into the river... eternally condemned... chasm breakage..
I hope time can be reversed... So tht my dreams will stay eternally...
Living in my fantasy... con moto... lacrimoso... agento...

HaPpy BiRtHDaY Br0ThEr DaViD

Yo bro!! HaPpy BiRtHDaY Br0ThEr DaViD!! Haha.. Wish u again and again.. HAih.. Until 12 o'clock... jking la... Oh.. Am i the 1st?? OH ya...

You're my mentor,
my idol[i'm not the oni 1... some like... j.lee oso said tis(i think he terpaksa).],
my big bro and....
Haha.. friends and brothers 4eva!!! XD

Hope u always smile(should've said tis to myself-.-")!!
Happy 4eva, with Lydia of course!!
AND MaY G0d BlEsS YoU iN YoUR DaiLy LiFe!!!

A PRESENT FOR U...

Here in the midst
of a lonely abyss
A single joy I find...
your presence in my mind.
Alone I dare not climb...
with you I reach new heights.
The tides of life run in and out, and are often very choppy
Look towards the horizon and know that your waters will be calm once more.
You are as delightful as daffodils or a purring kitten,
Let's get together soon,
cause friends like you make the world a special place!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Life is a carnival of fleeting light and dance
but playing, living and laughing together can make it last.
Wonder of wonders is a friend like you!
We have a history,
the kind that reaches far into the past,
and promises that in the future we'll remain friends...
forever.
Here's wishing you, my friend, a world of wonder,
Cast the gift of a lovely thought
into the heart of a friend.
I'm so glad we're friends, again!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Sometimes when we talk,
I begin to feel like so many things are still possible.
That it's OK to believe I can do the things I dream of.
A lot of times I feel so much better after spending time with you,
it's one of the reasons I'm glad to call you my friend!
Thinking of you and hoping you're staying out of trouble.
The stars are in your favor,
true hearts on your side!
Thinking of you with love today--
just like every day!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Nestled in my special corner
I think of good times shared with you.
The sea can wash away
everything but the memories will last,
as ours is a friendship that plays like a symphony...
lasting wherever we are..
Our hearts bind together,
forming infinite bonds--
a never ending friendship.
You make my world a little brighter!
You are my family and my friend,
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Cao first!!!

OMG!!! Wat a DIAGNOSTIC!!!

Wow!! Tis world is full of bombers...

Once the main switch is clicked, things started exploding....

The mines set in the underground...

BOOM!!! Bocor(psss)..

Then, the "coloured air" spread throughout the entire country.....

(Light bulb) Tink!!! We know the answer....

Right ppl?!

From Moky's blog.. I did wat she want me to do...

Rules and regulation of the tag
All 21 people must do unless you don't have a blog.
Write the names of 21 friends you can think of in your head.
And then answer the questions.
Say you're guessing if you don't know.
But at least guess on all of them.
After doing this, Tag your 21 unlucky friends to do the same.

1. Brother David

2. Ivan

3. Idhzan

4. Joe Yee

5. Derek Lee

6. Max

7. Moky

8. Zhan Hong

9. KeeYi

10. Wai Sin

11. Pei Yuen

12. Khoi Meng

13. Jeremy

14. Angel

15. Janice

16. Wee Keat

17. Wei Jie

18. Renny

19. Kristin

20. Keng Cheng

21. Ann Sin

1. How do you meet 7 (moky)?
standard 6, in the same class, oh.. I terspit the water at her. HAHA!!

2. What would you do if you and 15 (janice) had never met?
wat would i do? i'll nvr become the HODicipline.. jking...

3. What do you do if 20 (keng cheng) and 1 (brother david) dated?
Oh gosh!!! Tat will be against God's will..

4. Have you seen 17 (wei jie) cried?
NEVER. I wonder how he looks like when he cries?? Bwahahaha...

5. Would 4(joe yee) and 16(wee keat) make a good couple?
yes, wee keat will get smarter. Plus, duduk sama rendah, berdiri sama tinggi. LOL.

6. Do you think 11(pei yuen) is attractive?
wow!! i think we'll leave tat for keeyi to judge...

7. What is 2's (ivan) favourite colour?
GREY LA!!

8. When was the last time you talked to 9 (kee yi)?
uhmm, let's see.. 1 day ago. btw, we're in the same class. so...

9. What language does 8 (zhan hong) speak?
wat do u think a typical chinese guy will speak except mandarin or cantonese?

10. Who is 13 (jeremy) going out with?
us(me,zhanny,ivan)?

11. Would you ever date 17(wei jie)?
NO.

12. Where does 18(renny) live?
ok.. he's my younger brother. U think leh..?..?..

13. What is the best thing about 4(joe yee)?
she's the most competitive gal i've ever met. Compete wif the NO.1 in our class.. >.<

14. What would you like to tell 10(wai sin)right now?
hi KEAN SENG!!!

15. What is the best thing about 20 (keng cheng)?
the best bruther.. who'll und u somehow... haha..

16. Have you ever kiss 2(ivan)?
YUCKS!!!

17. What is the best memory you have of 5 (derek lee)?
when i went to his bday party.. gosh.. cant believe he did tat to daphne.. sigh...

18. When's the next time you're going to see 4(joe yee)?
this coming monday

19. How is 7(moky) different from 6(max)?
moky is male and max is female HAHAHA!

20. Is 2(ivan) pretty?
handsome u mean?? pretty when he take tat kinda gayish pic of ESPADA!! =.="

21. What is first impression of 15(janice)?
sore throat.

22. How did you meet 3(idhzan)?
in primary school, he's at the opposite class. Oh ya! Love to see his 360 degree break dance. LOLX.

23. Is 5(derek lee) your best friend?
best friend no, true friend oso no but uhmm... fun friend? Got such thing ah?

24. Do you hate 12(meng)?
NOOOO

25. Have you seen 18 (renny)in the last month?
i see him everyday

26. When was the last time you saw 16(wee keat)?
today and everyday.

27. Have you been to 5's (derek lee) house?
yes. for party.

28. When's the next time you'll see 10?(wai sin)
this coming monday

29. Are you close to 11(pei yuen)?
kinda.

30. Have you been to the movies with 4(joe yee)?
yup!! go to JJ and karaoke!!

31. Have you gotten in troble with 8(zhan hong)?
YES.

32. Would you give 19(kristine) a hug?
err.. if terpaksa.

33. When have you lied to 3(idhzan)?
ooo erm, never?

34. Is 11(pei yuen) good at socilizing?
OKOK lar...

35. Do you know a secret about 8(zhan hong)?
did he even have one?

36. Describe the relationship between 12(khoi meng) and (joe yee).
khoi2 copies homework from joe yee =D USED TO! XD

37. What's the best thing about your friendship with 9 (kee yi)?
i really dunno...

39. Have you ever had a crush on 12(khoi meng)?
i'll nvr...

40. How long have you known 2(ivan)?
lets see... since form 2.. i think... 2years and the half.

41. Does 11 (pei yuen) have any girlfriend / boyfriend?
hah? again 11? uhmm.. will she?? haha.

42. Have you ever wanted to punch 1(brother david) in the face?
YES?? AHAHHA! WHEN HE HAUNTS ME!

43. Has 21(ann sin) meet your parents?
yes.. only my mom.

44. How did you meet 11 (pei yuen)?
why always 11 de? close the curtain pls....

45. Did you ever accidentally physically hurt 3(idhzan)?
uhmm.. seriously... no.

46. Do you live close to 7(moky)?
near? walk bout 1hour, 5.5km.

47. What is 8(zhan hong)'s favourite food?
i think is... his mom's cooking?

48. What kind of car does 1(joey) have?
Gen 2 for sure. unless he change it.

49. Have you travelled anywhere with 9(keeyi)?
will i?

50. If you give 14(angel) a $100, what would she / he spend on it?
no idea. save 'em??

How Brother?? Should I go or Not??? Undecided.. and Xwelcome....

I dunno whether to go or not, I’m undecided and not firm,
Although people want me to go… but in my mind there was always…
Always something to block my mind… a few reasons…
Maybe it’s b’coz of points, it maybe coz of friendship,
Anyhow, I dun think it’s bout friendship…

Sometimes I did like to feel the warmth talking to you… or vice versa,
But… the answer is way too early..
It makes me feel guilty, depressed for wasting your time asking me to join,
What if I dun go? Will that make a difference from today?
Will you guys treat me better? For now you say I nid to social,
Then, next you will be busy, not you alone, everybody…

But I’m like sooo useless… can say soo.. I feel too.. I dunno bout you..
Not tat I dun social, but there’s something.. a great shadow.. an invincible wall…
Blocking my every single sense… Make me feel lonely and to the worst, numb,
Numb in everything, socializing, having fun, make me stressed up, boring,
not happy with things happening around me,
I felt like I’m breaking down.. as if I’m dead like corpse,
I felt like I’m not welcome here.. in this society, in this world..
Since small, young, till now.. Things are getting dull.. No more conductor..
Only insulator remains.. Btw, friends also going to be my insulator of life soon.. or I hope not,

Not like I like things to go this way.. But I’m born like this..
And probably this is the way God wans me to walk,
Even if I were to go to the camp, I might act as if nothing happens, just join,
I always try to make others happy, but I got the bad thing in return,
Why is tat so unfair? This society… full of mysteries and complications… Why?!
What other comforting words can I hear? Besides, only The LORD can saves me…

Saturday, 4th April 2009 – THE PARTY….

Today is suppose to be a wonderful day..

Everyone is so excited to prepare ourselves for the fantastic party. We(me, PeiSun and SukKhuan) are busy preparing those chickens for BBQ. Almost everyone are busy EXCEPT some who are busy wif FIFFY and MOMOU. After that,, we watch TV till Ivan(host) and KeeYi come. Yeah!! Everybody takes some of the things and go to the BBQ place. We leave our bags and stuffs.. and suddenly… we have problems like never bring tis and tat..

Well, God blessed, everything are solved. So, me, Ivan, KeeYi, KhoiMeng, ZhanHong and PeiSun decided to go for a swim.. We are swimming happily(at least I do).. Then.. Moky and John come. John then jump into the pool, started challenging others into swimming wif him. When nobody wans to, disaster come..

Simply say, he started offending me wif all kinds of so called jokes..i dunno he realized or not..but being mischief and pervert really piss me off..Thinking of ur sis and aunt Sally, how they’ve make my life alive.., I juz oblige myself to forgive u.. and of course take as if nothing has happened.. U should give thanks to the LORD as Michelle’s still wif u.. And thx a lot.. u really had destroyed my hope and day.
After swimming, all of us go up to have a BBQ session and ‘how to cook’ lesson by Miss Moky(future aunt Sally). Haha!! Then, we BBQ happily.. Out of the blue., it rains heavily.. wif strong winds blowing off our plates and cups. U guys won’t believe this. OPY can juz take as if she’s living in the peaceful world where nothing bad happens.. which is like “Its only me and my PSP” thg, u see??

I then take a look around me.. and look at the dark sky.. I knew something bad will happen today. True enough, I’m force, again, to go back early at 9pm even though Easter Cantata practice was cancelled. 9.30pm oso tak boleh. Also wif the reason that they(my parents) nid to sleep EARLY. Guess wat? I reach home, and they slept LATE… about 10++pm!! I really dun understand.. Worse is I’m treated coldly by most of them.

By adding tis condition and the way John treated me.. It’s enough to drive me into depress.. Making my day a GLOOMY, POIGNANT and MISERABLE DAY..~. So, in order to solve my prob, I went to sleep earlier than expected. Perhaps, I should oso thx John for tat.. make me sleep EARLY so that I dun sleep during worship. Btw, I dun expect any apologies from anyone.. But John, pls change ur attitude for a better future. U should learn to RESPECT more(u know wat I mean)..

Before I sleep, I did honestly pray that God will 4giv my sins and those who sins against me. I pray too tat u guys will have as much fun as u guys can/could coz I dun wan ppl to be like me.. can’t enjoy my very last moment… I tell u.. even IF WEEKEAT come., I’ll juz act normal.. Juz take him in.. I dunno bout KeeYi.. Tis is wat I can say. Oh ya!! To Moky: do u get any stomachache after drinking SARSIVAN? And anyone eat the “SPECIAL CHICKEN” prepared by IVAN?? Apart from everything, thx to you and KhoiMeng for planning tis party and invited me. I felt like I’m in a family for awhile. Thx ALOT!!

Stress.. And Psycho...

Haih... 2day got anugerah pelajar cemerlang... Boring... "Congratulations" to those who get it... Guys oni me, Hakim, Fassy, Iman, Tze Kitt, Jeremy, Julian, Khoi Meng, and Wei Jie.. Gals.. Joey and...

Since its so boring... The new counselor.. the man... Came in and do some test on us.. some psychology test.. sobsob.. I found out tat me and Hakim have the same critical stress.. on Emotional.. AND IMAN.. whoa.. 2 sections of CRITICAL.. I tell u.. the questions really make u terasa more then anythg...

Then, out of the blue... Hakim, Jeremy, Wei Jie and me turn out to be a add maths geek for like a while.. Everyone seems to be sooo rajin practising add maths.. Then, Koshella come to us and handed us 2pieces of PHYSICS papers. The exercises was all bout Chap2-Electricity. So, i redraw myself from the add maths group and do the PHYSICS thg. 1st paper easy(Thx to Anuar), 2nd hard(havent learn yet).

Also, now im in Makmal 2(sejarah period)... The latest F4 homeworks are like OMG!!! We have 52 SUBJECTIVE questions for PAGE1, 31 SUBJECTIVE questions for PAGE2, 4 SUBJECTIVE questions+(a,b,c,d,e for each question) from PAGE4->PAGE5 AND 2ESEI questions on PAGE6!!! OMG!!!!

So far, oni 2 of 5Gammaians have handed this and another student. It says in the paper: "GOOD LUCK!!" ..which is suppose to sound like "BAD LUCK!!". Of course, there's reward for who hand-in FIRST. Okay. Chow!!!

The Most Fascinating Event's About to Come...

Oh yeah!! I'm going to be the easter Cantata pianist.. Haha.. Shock sendiri!! Trust me.. The songs are.. sooo geng!!! Haha...
Toolbook so.. hard and mafan in the same time.. Getting harder to use computer nowadays.. Thanks to SPM... haih....

The Day... Today.. RENEW!!

Everything in this site is renewed... Haha(its obvious).. Except the blog posts of course... Well, if any of you who get to access this site... Pls inform ur friend who doesnt get to, to readd my blog link.. K?? Bye!!

Sick.. Sick.. But jokes and motivation comes in...

Y ppl keep getting sick nowadays?? Even Ivan oso get sick.. First time see him take medicine.. The kind of panadol that dissolve into the water. It's exciting.. (nvr see be4 ma...)And today is soo boring... Everyday no teacher... Got oso the not-tht-fun teacher... Well, but i realize one thg that.. Pn. Rohana is a motivator.. Agree?? At least 5 Lambdaians agree... She had her own philosophy... plus the great/successful ppl's philosophies... Combining them do motivate us... Hmmm... lets say that she's a good teacher after all.. Oh ya! One more thing... Anybody have seen Cik Fadzelah get angry be4? I mean.. she loves to joke... noe? Always cheering the class... Weird, holding the cane oso she laughs.. Hahaha!!! LOL. XD

A Poem Dedicated for Friendship among Us.."Ours is such a cultivated friendship." Hope you guys like it... Comment in my CBOX. K?

Here in the midst
of a lonely abyss
A single joy I find...
your presence in my mind.
Alone I dare not climb...
with you I reach new heights.
The tides of life run in and out, and are often very choppy
Look towards the horizon and know that your waters will be calm once more.
You are as delightful as daffodils or a purring kitten,
Let's get together soon,
cause friends like you make the world a special place!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Life is a carnival of fleeting light and dance
but playing, living and laughing together can make it last.
Wonder of wonders is a friend like you!
We have a history,
the kind that reaches far into the past,
and promises that in the future we'll remain friends...
forever.
Here's wishing you, my friend, a world of wonder,
Cast the gift of a lovely thought
into the heart of a friend.
I'm so glad we're friends, again!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Sometimes when we talk,
I begin to feel like so many things are still possible.
That it's OK to believe I can do the things I dream of.
A lot of times I feel so much better after spending time with you,
it's one of the reasons I'm glad to call you my friend!
Thinking of you and hoping you're staying out of trouble.
The stars are in your favor,
true hearts on your side!
Thinking of you with love today--
just like every day!
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Nestled in my special corner
I think of good times shared with you.
The sea can wash away
everything but the memories will last,
as ours is a friendship that plays like a symphony...
lasting wherever we are..
Our hearts bind together,
forming infinite bonds--
a never ending friendship.
You make my world a little brighter!
You are my family and my friend,
Ours is such a cultivated friendship.

Happy...

Haha.. y am i soo happy..?? Coz i get to on9 nowadays to do my homeworks... as in putting a time wif my mom. haha.. cheering up!! Anyway.. Nearly finish my h.works.. haha... Ntg to say liao... Haih.. sry for the drama anyway.. It's ending..

Sigh... A "long day"...

Hi everyone! How r u guys doing?? Anyway, I wake up today.. at 8.15am(i think)... then sleep back till 8.30am... wake up again.. Bath.. drink 2 packets of cereal.. then.. guess wat? Off to skool.. to touch up some of my Seni Project... When i reached there, all i see's Intan and a group of Cheerleaders.. Gosh... can u imagine Mawar in Cheerleading???

Then, we waited for about an hour for others to come... Of course, we went up to the Seni room FIRST to prepare those Seni stuff... After tat, both of us search for Pn. Aslinda.. We searched like nobody business.. And got a news from someone tat Pn. Aslinda bersalin... Then, IN SHOCKED CONDITION, Intan ask the gal again... And she said maybe. For a while, Ustazah came and said she come to skool. We wry... while waiting for the late comers... Then, Nurul and a Japanese guy come... We discuss bout each others project.. Everyone draw so nice.. i think mine's the WORST.. haih... Then, PeiYuen... OR Reverse.. I forgot liao... Seems like PeiYuen's interested in talking to the Japanese guy. Juz tat she malu... Farhana.. come wif the Weird look like she's make-up. Time is clocking..., teacher still haven't masuk bilik Seni.. PeiYuen decided to chow... so does Nurul and the guy...

Suprisingly, teacher come.. Tat, really comforted us... She said she was in the bilik SU.. to kemaskini the exam stuffs.. Ok. then all three of us started doing our own works while listening to the songs from Farhana's hp, then Intan's, then mine. Basically, we are drawing some lukisan realistik following our own printed pictures.. The time's slow like tortoise.. Luckily, Intan have somethg to cheer us up.. She called Nurul for the Japanese guy's email.. Then while waiting for Nurul's reply, she called PeiYuen and ask her... Of course, she said YES!!! Then, the fun starts... Hehe...

Sigh.. 6 hrs in skool only drawing.. I can't take it anymore when my stomach started making noise... So i went to the condo to have my favourite Black Pepper mee!! Ya... everybody knows bout tis... Believe it anot, I add 2 plates and a cup of "Iced Tea"(Translate to canto urself). Then, go back to bilik seni and continue my works again... Till, 2.30pm.. Go back hme... I'm satisfy tat I ady finished my lukisan.. Juz tat I realize now tat the colour i coloured on my drawing wrong liao... Feel like crying now... But i dun care.. Juz modify them lah.. Takkan draw again rgt??

So, PeiSun.. I dun think tis's anyhow EMO to u, rgt? I'm cheering up ady.. despite of settling wif tat DRAMA, so to speak. I give u my word tat tis drama will settle soon, k? Or u want it to cont.. But if cont hor... SOMEBODY OUT THERE will insult The LORD again.. so how?? (Haih.. 1st time seeking advice from u...). Reply on my CBox, ya?? Bye!!

Taylor's College...

Haih.. today.. Set wrong alarm.. 5.30am woke up.. Crazy.. I thought i'm late. lol. Then, sleep again... Woke up again at 7.15am... Bath and bla3... Went down... to living room.. Wear my socks and the rest. Chow to skool.!! Almost everythere ady except few of them.. I went up to the class and took my sej paper.. Juz to finish Cik Fadzelah's work.. But it's too much.. How leh? Then.. everybody lk so yeng wif jeans.. haha... The talks on 1st impression very gd. The options after SPM oso gd. But im still on my boat.. sailing to nowhere... anyway.. moving on after cumin back to skool.. i went for tuition and tat.. non-stop... haih.. so tired...

Saya telah di"Bingkai Gambar"..

Wat the hell? Framed? I certainly dun accept tis.. Who's ababoom, huh?! Are u from the underworld? lost? Haih.. aiyo... why i always jadi decoy de?? so zharm.... others cannot meh.? choose ivan and see la..(jkjk) i tau la.. i kurang on9.. tapi tak perlulah guna nama gua..!!! brengsek!! see? make me kasar liao... luckily, i tak say the F word.. cemarkan my name oni... I on9 oso in skool.. during duty hours.. if i have a chance.. not like u on9 tak habis2... on9 saja buat kerja tak berfaedah... Saya tak berhak menghukum kau.. tapi Tuhan akan... (ei? Y suddenly bm de?)

Ahermm!! I hope u'll stop tis.. devil!! Pls dun feel hurt coz u're a devil, followers of Lucifer.!. do u know how satan works? read ur 'God words' u ungodly ppl!! I bet u dun even plead for forgiveness... coz ALL THE WHILE U R A SINNER... and a SINNER are earthly followers tat do not understand tat sooner or later u will be split, a chasm will befall on u... like the distance b'tween hell and heaven...!! Like i say.. i can't punish u.. im only a human.. God will. Tis time.. u should be praying for forgiveness... AND MEAN IT!!

Till then, i will kip to God's word: "He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,... to comfort all who mourn." Isaiah 61:1-2 (Dun wry.. i bukannya nak mati...)

Haih.. How many times i've to emphasize???!!! I'm going to say the truths RGT NOW!!!

Ppl change according to time.. Even i oso change.. I'm not the old DERRICK who used to be disturbed and bullied anymore. I make my decisions and follow them. Ivan's not the OLD IVAN u guys know.. lazy.. Now he has change a lil' become more hardworking. KeeYi.. still the same but worse. Joey.. speechless(dun dare to say). Moky.. Very 'spoiled egg'(in canto).. KhoiMeng semakin fat hau.. for some reason. ZhanHong.. I get more info bout places from him. WeeKeat oso.. i should say.. somethg's wrong wif him... Nik.. OMG... The Intan's gang.. more friendly than last year.. HonHerng.. Ikut Fassler for one reason tat everybody knows... Hakim and Idhzan.. oso better.. at least to me.. than last time.. JulianYee.. gd to me oso.. for some reason. TzeKitt.. dunno wat to say.. JeremyLui.. "Joey, u know...".. Khairil.. uhmm.. As dead as robot expression.. WeiJie.. pursuing his IT-ness in watever thg he do.. DerekLee.. kinda bad and gd in certain aspects... Geetha and the gang.. pretty gd. oso... SookKwan and Rowena.. always in their DREAM BOAT... ImanPratama.. uhmm.... too much of socializing... for some reason.. KeiYan and the gang.. "colder" nowadays... Last but not least.. Fassy.. Still the same.. but change a lil', i could say.

Ok. I've said enough.. I apologize for anythg i've said tat hurts u guys here. Well, tis's the oni way. Since i can't and i dun say the "F" word to anybody. And if u would like to comment on me., juz say or tell them in front of me OR IF u DUN WAN, juz write it on my CBOX. K???

The new face....

Haha... Everybody today looks new... I see KeeYi in Love NOT wif HUMAN BUT wif SONGS!! David Archuletta's Song!! Plus... Ivan wif new Add Maths face.., Which is impossible last time... Zhan Hong wif calculator-clever face. And ME, wif my genius face.. Jokingla... Sleepy face... coz sleep late marh... Haih... Basicly.. im waiting for the G-A-A-Y-A's BDAy!!! Can't wait to EAT!!!! HAPPY EARLY BDAY GAAYA!!!

Life on The Moon( A Sad Life) - Why?? Till When You Wanna Hide from me??!! Am I not Good Enough?! Juz Tell me Straight into My Eyes!!! I begged u....

I wake up in the morning as usual... Went to skool... And waited at the corner... Nothing less or more... I saw a mother hugging her daughter sooo tightly.. I wander why? Do u ever think why?

Every hugs may be the last hug... Well, like it or not.. we dunno when we'll die.. Touch wood.. we might die tomoro or after.. anytime.. without us realizing it.. Death can swipe us faster than anything else.. For example.. You can kill an ant juz by stepping on it. PIAKK!! There, the ant dies during its journey to its nest.

Perhaps it is now for us to think that love comes first. Some might not agree wif me.. for some reason.. BUT! I know.. our life's not as long as those ppl last time.. Like Abraham and his fellow descendants.. Coz of our sins.. God have shorten our life span.. Let me ask some question. Do u love someone before anyone else or perhaps more than yourself? Do u ever hug him or her? Have u ever have someone that you juz take as a petbro, petsis or your kaikor, kaimui or et cetera? Did everything went well from top to bottom?

I've seen enough.. And experienced this... The results may vary depending on individuals.. The person.. I've been wif juz a couple of weeks, the relationship when well for few days coming to a week.. Hmmm... Then, it went slightly out of the line... Something's wrong.. I dunno why.. Every question i throw to him seems to get a positive ans, WHICH i suppose its not an HONEST ANS. Takkan everythg oso positive.. rgt? Pasti ada negative.... It seems like i'm a ghost(invisible) in front of him... Whether there's someone around me anot. He oni layan the ppl around me, not me. When i ask why? Ans is "Nothing la.. Lazy to talk oni ma.." or "Lazy to think." Wat?! This's nonsense! That means Rajin to talk to others la?! IS IT?!

After a few days.. some particular problem persisted.. Complicated till i dun wanna tell. I've told him to change, as motivation., although i know it won't work.. But i got the scolding, so to speak, from him. Of course, i did call up for apology and the comfortable yet masked-ans came out from that his mouth. "Ntg. I'm tat sui hei meh??" Thanks... tat's so "comforting".. Then i read KeeYi's blog.. Something strikes me... I dunno why... Whenever i think bout it.. It strikes me.

Well.. I never like tis in our relationship... Plus.. I realized ppl are getting further from me... Even in my life.. Relative.. Friends... Close ones.. All of them getting further and further.. Am i tat monstrous?? Ppl.. why can't u juz tell me bout my mistakes or probs? Now i start to und the concept of living... The masked of life.. Always lying to faces... The "imperfect" smile... the "comforting" words.. and so on. It has never been true in my life that somebody is honest wif me.. Everything comes with an intention.. Some "backboned" words...

PPL!! JUZ TELL ME WAT U DUN LIKE BOUT ME AND DUN HIDE IT!!! ITS VERY PAINFUL!!!(may be, oni some of u will know this feelings of mine...) :(

THX TO U!!! LIES COVER ME!!!

Thx to u... I dun feel tis WORLD can be TRUSTED anymore... Unless... Grace is on u that forgiveness may pass.... My life will continue wif mask; fakeness..lies!!!

Sry..KaiKor...

I din't mean to do this... But it's complicated... I dun look like me when i'm under "Xtra" condition... Hope that it will not be hurtful to your heart... SRY>>>>>.........

HAih.... Happy... and boring..

Today.. me and KaiKor and Pei Yuen in class... Sweep floor... everyone GO BACK EARLY!!!

ATTENTION!!!(Pei Yuen, Kee Yi, Moky, Khoi Meng, Zhan Hong, Ivan Chew)

HEY LAMDAIANS!! REMEMBER TO CHECK YOUR MAIL FOR THE KERJA AMAL PICS... AND I'VE EXCLUSIVELY INCLUDED OUR LAMBDA-BLEACH SHOTS AND POWERPOINT PRESENTATION. IF IT'S NOT IN UR MAIL, PLS PASS ME UR PENDRIVE SO THAT I CAN TRANSFER THEM IN THE LIBRARY ON WEDNESDAY! Any question u guys can call me or SMS me. Talk in skool oso available. CHOW FIRST!!

Worst day of Intervensi 1...

Wat?! ICT, Sejarah, Physics?! All the mind-blowing subjects?? but I'm surprise... Sejarah is much more easy than i thought.... For objective of course... subjective can kill if nvr study... I can't believe there's ppl copy for Moral... Haih.. the truth bout him... Oh ya.. Watch out ppl... Especially when u're in library.. U'll nvr know when i'll "PMS"....

Exam... Intervensi 1...

Chemist was as "easy" as XYZ.... Add Maths oso the same... no diff... Can't belief my counter exceeds ivan's... Lolx. Nvr even update.... Miracle. 2molo Sej, IT and Physics.. Killing subjects... Y la like this.?. Summore all bout Form4 and a lil' Form 5. Plus, I can't imagine maths are sooo EASY...!!! We should say thank you to the government!! Ok.. Sumbody pls tell WAT IS WRONG WIF THE WORD "BRO"??!! Got to go... by ppl!! I'll try to write more next time!!! Sayonara~

HapPy NeW YeaR!!(Bad year for those F5 :-()

Haih.. sry ppl... Can't on9 nowadays coz SPM approaching... Now oni on9.. last i guess... Haha anyway, HapPr New YeaR to you guys.. New year new resolutions ya?? So, let us look forward in everything that we do. Lolx. I'm not spending my HAPPY HOLIDAYS well though.. as i'm facing a sudden double allergies attack... Weird huh?? They juz hard to handle... Have to take Curam(antibiotics), some Zvrtec(anti-allergy), and Panadols.... Sad... Gtg now... Stop here 4 now... Bye!!